Do you carry a gun while out on a ride?

KingOfTheApes

(I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)

Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.

I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
tool.

So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...

....

I think a water gun would be a good option. The guy may suffer from a
heart attack, but then you respond with a random act of kindness and
spray his windshield.

That would teach him two lessons: Not to mess with the cyclists and
that we are a friendly bunch!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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On Tue, 17 Jun 2008 15:30:24 -0700 (PDT)
KingOfTheApes <comandante.banana@yahoo.com> wrote:

> (I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
> but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
> practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)
>
> Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
> are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.
>
> I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
> where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
> need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
> tool.
>
> So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...
>
> ...
>
> I think a water gun would be a good option. The guy may suffer from a
> heart attack, but then you respond with a random act of kindness and
> spray his windshield.
>
> That would teach him two lessons: Not to mess with the cyclists and
> that we are a friendly bunch!
>
A heat-seeking missile that plugs the tailpipe would be good. Or maybe
a launcher that splats unpleasant goo down the side of anything that
passes too close. If someone pulled a gun on me when I was driving I'd
flatten him.

dgk

On Tue, 17 Jun 2008 15:30:24 -0700 (PDT), KingOfTheApes
<comandante.banana@yahoo.com> wrote:

>(I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
>but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
>practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)
>
>Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
>are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.
>
>I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
>where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
>need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
>tool.
>
>So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...
>
>...
>

Wouldn't that add too much weight?

Bruce Gilbert

"KingOfTheApes" <comandante.banana@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:ffe5b182-96d1-4fbe-8c31-8b8f84b4edd2@34g2000hsf.googlegroups.com...
> (I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
> but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
> practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)
>
> Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
> are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.
>
> I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
> where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
> need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
> tool.
>
> So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...
>
> ...
>
> I think a water gun would be a good option. The guy may suffer from a
> heart attack, but then you respond with a random act of kindness and
> spray his windshield.
>
> That would teach him two lessons: Not to mess with the cyclists and
> that we are a friendly bunch!
>
That is way too much gear to haul. Guns are heavy, especially on hills. All
guys carry an on-board liquid supply with a user actuated flexible delivery
system. Demonstrate real man fitness, jump onto the hood of the car and
perform the windshield cleaning ritual. It is sure to be a YouTube hit. In
fact, we can host a video contest, judged like any Olympic level event.
Height, distance, flow, color, pattern and grip style are all considered in
the point score. It will be the cycling version of the ever-popular bull
riding on Versus. Will windshield wipers serve as reins?

Bruce

KingOfTheApes

On Jun 18, 8:50*am, dgk <d...@somewhere.com> wrote:
> On Tue, 17 Jun 2008 15:30:24 -0700 (PDT), KingOfTheApes
>
>
>
>
>
> <comandante.ban...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> >(I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
> >but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
> >practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)
>
> >Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
> >are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.
>
> >I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
> >where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
> >need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
> >tool.
>
> >So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...
>
> >...
>
> Wouldn't that add too much weight?- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

Compact grenade launchers are best...

http://www.airsoftatlanta.com/images/mb_agx_jpg.jpg

Sorry, out of stock!

KingOfTheApes

(Some people may be surprised that we in America have the need to
carry a gun when riding a bike, but then we should remind them the
bicycle has a place in violent places)

Originally Posted by evan_phi
(from Canada)
"jeeeeesus 8-ballin' christ..."

Why are you surprised??

Bicycles were iniatially set up for WWI. And I believe the special
commandos still use them...

http://www.combatreform.com/atb.htm

See, Iraq seems to be a bike friendly place --provided you carry the
right guns.

I always love the James Bond music, don't you guys?

KingOfTheApes

(Notice I'm accused here of promoting "armed insurrection." Well, it
depends what you understand by "gun")

Originally Posted by st0ut
"The OP would like to see who carries a firearm to ward off cars( that
in his mind threaten him.)
He is too afraid to ride and think the only way for the streets to be
safe is armed insurrection. In this case the OP should NOT have a
firearm. has he views himself as judge and jury. And General of his
revolution.
Basically he wants to take pot shots and anyone that gets tooo close
to him. or yells out the window."


You've been reading too much Mao lately... Me, armed insurrection?

Oh yes, my gun is a banana. They are the perfect weapon since I can
simply eat them, but if you carry it in your pocket it'll look like
something else... a gun, you know.

Then you can say, "Stick 'em up!" or "Stick it in!" Whatever that
shows you a tough contender.

NOTE: This is not promotion but I've got a T-shirt that says, "That
thing in pocket is only a banana!"

PoB

"KingOfTheApes" <comandante.banana@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:ffe5b182-96d1-4fbe-8c31-8b8f84b4edd2@34g2000hsf.googlegroups.com...
| (I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
| but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
| practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)
|
| Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
| are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.
|
| I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
| where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
| need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
| tool.
|
| So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...

I've often wondered about strapping a punt gun to the underside of the boom
of my 'bent, add the trigger to the hardware on my bars - half a pound of
lead shot should grab the attention of even the most vacuous of cagers.

True, the reload time for one of these is measured on a calendar, but
there's not normally any need to reload, as anything in front of you for
about 50 yards tends to quietly evaporate.

Some people may think that this is a tad over the top, but, you know, you've
gotta get their attention somehow

pOB

KingOfTheApes

On Jun 18, 10:27*am, "PoB" <P...@lackof.org> wrote:

> Some people may think that this is a tad over the top, but, you know, you've
> gotta get their attention somehow
>
> pOB

And I've found out that "somehow" to be...

Originally Posted by chipcom
"I would have a pang of remorse reading that t-shirt after I shot
you...but your day would be pretty much ruined."

None of your weapons address the predator before he eats you. He flies
by you and shouts, "Hey *******, get off my road!" And speeds away.
You are left humiliated and powerless, even if you carry a gun.

I, on the other hand, have other T-shirt that says, "Hungry?" Then on
back, "You can eat my banana!"* I call it pre-emptive strike... Hey,
you may even get some chick out there --who happens to be hungry. Just
carry bananas.

PS: It's not what you think. That's what the monkey told the hungry
lion. And guess what the lion told the monkey...?

KingOfTheApes

I finally figured out how to fight back without making enemies that
can kill you...

"Hey, this is an original way to make friends among the unfriendly.
Just make sure to wave and smile back when they honk at you..."

http://www.zazzle.com/honk_shirt-235350066516776730

Marc

PoB wrote:
> "KingOfTheApes" <comandante.banana@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:ffe5b182-96d1-4fbe-8c31-8b8f84b4edd2@34g2000hsf.googlegroups.com...
> | (I'm not going to be posting here for a while --unless requested--,
> | but in case you are not protected by the revolution soon, here's some
> | practical advice so you can survive under the worst conditions)
> |
> | Well, it seems that self-defense sometimes calls for a gun, and there
> | are plenty of offenses committed against cyclists out there.
> |
> | I'm not advocating violence at all, but it seems that, of all places
> | where the gun may be necessary, the cyclist may have the most pressing
> | need for it. Almost as much, let's say, as a pump and a multi-wrench
> | tool.
> |
> | So let's hear from the pacifists and the NRA people alike...
>
> I've often wondered about strapping a punt gun to the underside of the boom
> of my 'bent, add the trigger to the hardware on my bars - half a pound of
> lead shot should grab the attention of even the most vacuous of cagers.
>
> True, the reload time for one of these is measured on a calendar, but
> there's not normally any need to reload, as anything in front of you for
> about 50 yards tends to quietly evaporate.
>
"quietly evaporate"????

Dane Buson

In rec.bicycles.misc Marc <initial.surname@btintenret.com> wrote:
> PoB wrote:
>>
>> True, the reload time for one of these is measured on a calendar, but
>> there's not normally any need to reload, as anything in front of you for
>> about 50 yards tends to quietly evaporate.
>>
> "quietly evaporate"????

You're thinking "noisily evaporate" I imagine, much like I am?

--
Dane Buson - n0n6t0p8@unixbigots.org
The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. Instead of
altering their views to fit the facts, they alter the facts to fit their
views ... which can be very uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the
facts that needs altering. -- Doctor Who, "Face of Evil"

KingOfTheApes

Originally Posted by UnsafeAlpine
"Wow, I didn't realize I'm such a wimp for not bringing a gun with me
everywhere I go, for not being a frightened kid who has to resort to
machismo to feel important. Well, time to go buy that AK I keep seeing
for sale so I can be a real man."

Remember the grenade launcher I posted somewhere...

But the point is that the speed differential between cars and bikes
and the fact that we share the same road, puts us all at odds. The
quick tempered drivers feel you are on "their" turf and they have
every right to push you around. Then you feel the need to fight back
and, whether with a banana or a bazooka, the whole thing becomes a
confrontation. To me, we have been set up in this stupid situation, in
which we each should have our own space, and that calls for one of two
solutions: BIKE LANES or SLOW LANES, where bikes have the priority.

Short of that, we will see the Wild West out there. "The one that
draws the fastest, wins."

KingOfTheApes

(This is a selection of "best of the best" posts from another group.
You deserve no less)

Originally Posted by Trajan265
"I always carry a gun when I'm out on a ride...but then again it's my
job."
www.BethlehemBikePolice.com
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPs89cJVGa0


When is America putting undercover cops on bikes to ride regular
streets? I bet you could catch more than one criminal out there.