New Employee

Guest

The manager of a large office noticed a new employee one day and told
him to come into his office.

"What is your name?" he asked the new guy. "John," the man replied.

The manager scowled. "Look here, this is a respectable company, and I
don't call anyone by their first name.

I refer to my employees by their last name only - Smith, Jones, Baker -
that's all. And I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson.

Now, give me your name." The new guy said, "My name is John Darling."

The manager quickly replied, "Welcome aboard, John!"

;D

Guest

Goog one OCLV

It's Saturday morning and Bob's just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So Bob heads back to the clubhouse and phones home.
"Hello?" says a little girl's voice.

"Hi, honey, it's Daddy," says Bob. "Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank."

After a brief pause, Bob says, "But you haven't got an Uncle Frank, honey!"

"Yes, I do, and he's upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy!"

"Okay, then. Here's what I want you do. Put down the phone, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout in to Mommy and Uncle Frank that my car's just pulled up outside the house."

"Okay, Daddy!" A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone. "Well, I did what you said, Daddy."

"And what happened?"

"Well, Mommy jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming, then she tripped over the rug and went out the front window and now she's all dead."

"Oh, my God! What about Uncle Frank?"

"He jumped out of bed with no clothes on too, and he was all scared and he jumped out the back window into the swimming pool. But he must have forgot that last week you took out all the water to clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now he's dead too."

There is a long pause.

"Swimming pool? Is this 854-7039?"

Guest

;D

I like this forum.

Guest

more! more!  ;D