Woody in first grade

Julian Radowsky

The teacher asked, "Woody, what's your problem?" Woody answered,
"I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm
smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"

Ms. Brooks had enough. She took Woody to the principal's office. While
Woody waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal
what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy
a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to
the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Woody was brought in and the
conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?" Woody: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Woody: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a
3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and
tells her, "I think Woody can go to the 3rd grade."

Ms. Brooks! says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."
The principal and Woody both agreed.

Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Woody, after a moment: "Legs."
Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

The principal wondered, why would she ask such a question!

Woody replied: "Pockets."

Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"

Woody: "Pants."

Ms. Brooks: "What's starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?"

Woody: "Coconut."
The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.

Ms. Brooks : "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"

The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer.

Woody: "Bubble gum".

Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting
down and a dog do on three legs?! "

Woody: "Shake hands."

The principal was trembling.
Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K'
that means a lot of heat and excitement?"

Woody: "Firetruck"

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher,
"Put Woody in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong."

__________________
If you look after your body, it might last you a lifetime.

"If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough." - Mario Andretti

A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station....
what more can I say.......