men cyclists?

rule62

LOL...the best thing that ever happened to me was when I took a chance and started dating the one woman I knew who was strong, very disciplined, very focused, very dedicated and didn't go out drinking 5 nights a week.

She is a remarkable and amazing woman, equally as head strong, driven and committed as am I. We had to learn how to give and take, and even moreso how to master the art of knowing when to just let things flow given our dominant personalities. She doesn't take any shiznit off of me and vice versa. Instead we do our best to respect each other and take into account what we both need, rather than to always be sparring the other for a more dominant role.

We still catch ourselves competing against each other all the time, mostly in little silly ways. That won't likely change either. We can't help it. I figure that when we are 80 going down the hall with our walkers we will be trying to bump the other off their line to gain a better position. We don't take it so seriously though that it gets in the way. In the meantime, it is great to know that there is someone strong and resourceful to watch your back or to take the lead out when you need to get out of the wind. We damn near had to hire attornies to negotiate the process for starting a family. It was harder than we thought to give up enough of our lives to bring another personality into the mix. As it turns out, those strong characteristics and traits that we both admire in one another make excellent groundwork for being good parents. Now we have a six year-old who has a head of his own, will take the lead on a walk even when he doesn't know where we going, but is also learning to match his needs against those of others. The best part is that he is also discovering that some of the greatest joys in life come from not always trying to go your own way.

Having said all that, what I have found over the years with a woman who is clearly my equal if not my better is harmony. I look back and can still say that moving forward in a relationship with her was the biggest risk and challenge that I have ever undertaken. I knew that if I was fell in love with her, it was going to mean that I would have to be willing to grow in order to stay. I'm twice the person that I would have been if left to my own devices. I'm not saying that it was easy, but man was it worth it. Am I saying that every head strong, driven male out there is willing to sacrifice and accept the changes that must come in a relationship with an equally strong and capable woman. Nope. Still you might be surprised by how many such guys there are out there who aren't willing to commit to a strong relationship until they can find an equal.

Interesting topic...I hadn't thought about any of this in about 20 years. Funny how perspective changes as you grow. Best of luck to you ladies.