Confucius says....

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Virginity like bubble - one prick, all gone.

Man who run in front of car get tired.

Man who run behind bus get exhausted.

Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

Man who scratch his bum should not bite fingernails.

Man who eat prunes get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong - man with four balls cannot walk.

War doesn't determine who's right - only who's left.

Wife who puts husband in doghouse will soon find him in cathouse.

Man who fights with wife all day get no piece that night.

It take many nails to build crib but only one screw to fill it.

Man who drive like hell bound to get there.

Man who stand on toilet seat is high on pot.

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

And the grandaddy of them all....

Man must live by dog's rule of life - if you can't eat it or f*** it, pee on it.

...He who go to bed with sex problem on mind, wake up with solution on stomach.